I couldn't think of a title so I used this one which does fit:D. On Friday July 13th I had major back surgery. My back had to be reconstructed. I am now fused from T-8 all the way down to my Sacral area. The surgery took about 9 hours with 2 surgeons. Problem was they couldn't wake me up in recovery which was a concern for the Doctors,Nurses,and my family.
As for me I was in total darkness for I don't know how long. I mean I don't feel like I'm in my body and I'm wearing normal clothes. Nothing but darkness, time standing still. Suddenly I hear familiar voices, of people who have died. My grandparents are telling me it's okay if I want to let go and come home to them. They say I have been through enough and I need the rest. My father in-law joins in saying the same. I make my decision they are right, I knew going in that I could die. I start feeling lighter and floating but something is stopping me, I feel like I am anchored. I start to panic a little and start to pull at whatever is anchoring me. I gave one more pull and all of a sudden I'm in pain back in my body still trying to pull away. I open my eyes and my best friend had been at the hospital for most of my surgery with my daughter and my husband who works at the hospital. My best friend was the anchor, she had my hand in both of hers and she is praying holding my hand to her heart. I was awake for only a little while but I found out that the nurses had been trying to wake me up for 3 hours and I have to stay in recovery overnight because of my vitals.
They got me up for a short walk on Sunday and sat me in a chair when we got back to my room. I had my left leg over my right and I feel a dog nose on my toe and when I looked I saw an outline of a small fuzzy dog. Many years before they had a dog lab in the infancy of heart surgery to learn procedures. Which made no sense to me when I found out because a dog anatomy is nowhere near that of a human but I guess a heart is a heart (I was at St. Francis Hospital a top Heart Hospital). Then a few seconds later I felt a tap on my head like hey sit straight. Right after that my nurse came in to see how I am and I tell her I want to go back to bed.
I had told the nurse and nurse companions about a problem I had with an air bed like mine in another hospital years ago, it had broken. Thursday night after a long walk with the physical therapist I get back to my room and my bed is broken so they had to get me another bed!
The next day I was discharged and was glad to be home. My son Eric (WhiteWolf) has been an incredible help. He took the N.Y. State Trooper test last year and scored an 89 and made the list of candidates. I am so proud of him.
A couple of weeks later I was very sleepy after my alarm. My daughter didn't like the way I was sitting in the dining room chair so she told me go sit in the recliner in my sleepy state. I told her to F off because in reality she could try the patience of a Saint. I started sleep walking a little while later and was at the kitchen sink waking up trying to figure out why I can't walk and I see what looked like a disembodied fist and forearm and I feel like I got punched in the heart. The hit was so hard it knocked me off my feet and I fell flat on my back knocking the wind out of me. I tried yelling for help but it came out little more than a whisper so I rolled onto my side until I could get the strength to get up myself which took awhile. I finally got up and got Eric, my heart felt funny but I've had anxiety attacks because of my daughter before so as long as I wasn't altered we just put it down to that. Some things would vanish then return after I said put it back.
I think the strangest thing of all is the dogs. We kept both parents and 3 of their puppies weight range from 88 pounds (the father a normal Malamute) to 131 pounds (the mother a M'Loot Malamute a.k.a. A giant Malamute). All of the dogs have been as careful with me as they can but will be rough with others.
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